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A letter to myself when I think I can’t make it through….

Dear Self,

Remember that time you found all those messages from another woman on your then husband’s computer and you felt like your entire world fell apart? Remember how you kept thinking the messages had to be just about over, but they went on for and on for over a year. Remember that one message where they met up?

At first you cried and were angry. You felt betrayed. Then you thought you did something wrong. Later you realized it wasn’t your fault, and guess what?

You made it.

Remember that time you looked at your dog and realized he didn’t know who you were, and then he decided to not eat for an entire week, and kept wandering outside in the freezing cold and couldn’t find his way back in? Remember you had just gotten divorced and didn’t have any money to pay for all the tests the vet wanted to do and two days later you had to take him back to the vet to only walk out without him.

You made it through that too.

Remember that first summer you had to let your boys stay with their father for eight entire weeks when you hadn’t ever been away from them for more than two? Remember your youngest crying because he didn’t want to leave you, but your older two couldn’t wait to go? Remember how it felt like part of you was missing for that entire summer?

You made it through it.

Remember that time when you lost a lot of friends and family members because you decided to file for divorce and they didn’t even ask for your side of the story? Remember how you stayed quiet and let lies and rumors be told about you because you were so hurt that people would even begin to believe the things that were said about you?

You made it through.

Remember that time when schools were shut down and you had to homeschool three children while working full-time from home?

You made it!

I know you are struggling right now. This summer has been difficult. I know you haven’t seen your boys in 39 days.  You have been working from home and have spent most of your days alone. You need to try and look for something positive every single day, even if some days you have to look a little harder. Remember that just since you can’t control what is happening, you can control how you respond. This is just a season in life. This isn’t forever.  

Love,

Yourself

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